My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the veterinarian. He found the problem was hair in its ears and cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine.
The veterinarian told the lady if she wanted to keep this from recurring,

Need money? Go to Walmart or Target to the self-checkout and grab someone’s receipt that was left behind. Then go around finding the items, then return them with the receipt.

Lol, this just may be a good idea. However, there is a lot of risk involved too. For

If opposites attract, I should be dating a gorgeous, billionaire supermodel that has a loving family.

This is not exactly true, but it is correct in some ways. For example, have you wondered that a man and woman are exactly different types of people. A man has different

A naked bisexual polar bear with bipolar disorder is a bare bipolar bipolar bear.

Lol, I don’t even know where to begin, I think I’m lost already. Let’s begin with what bisexual means: It is a person attracted to both sex types meaning man and woman. They are

Yō mamma’s so fat, when she put on her yellow raincoat and went outside, all the kids yelled the bus is coming! The bus is coming! 

What a wonderful joke, this is a good one and makes sense in a way. If you are wondering why it has

Yō mama’s so fat, that when she fell no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up.

Lol, this is a joke that makes sense, and you just never know could be a possibility. I mean let’s not forget just how big dinosaurs were. And if they

Only Chuck Norris can smell estrogen.

I don’t even know what kind of a joke this is and that if it even makes sense. If you are unaware of what estrogen is, it is basically what I like to say the growth of the body. It is deeper

If Chuck was on the walking dead, them zombies play dead when Chuck is around.

I sure would play dead too, (lol) as I was growing up, Chuck was someone I was always looking up to. His movies and karate have inspired me from a child and until

Blonde: “what does IDK stands for? “
Brunette: “I Don’t know.”
Blonde: “OMG nobody does.”

In realistic, IDK stands for “I Don’t Know.” Sometimes when people ask questions, and you are texting you can just reply back with IDK. It is shorter and faster and often makes sense as it

A blond meets up with a friend as she’s picking up her car from the mechanic.
“Everything ok with your car now?”
“Yes, thank goodness,” the blonde replies.
“Weren’t you worried the mechanic might try to rip you off?” “Yeah, but he didn’t. I was so relieved when he told

Chuck Norris, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Jean Claude Van Damme were talking one day. Chuck Norris asked, “If you were a musician, who would you be?” Chuck Norris said, “I would be Mozart.” Jean Claude Van Damme said, “I would be Beethoven.” Arnold said, “I’ll be Baach!”

I’m not

When you tell a 18-year-old girl if she wants to meet a guy she will ask “is he handsome.”
When you tell a 25-year-old girl she will “where does he work.”
And when you ask to a 30-year-old girl she will ask “where is he now.”

Well, in real world

Me: “can you give me a ride to the store really quick?”
Friend: “I’m not a damn taxi service, if I take you, I want some money out of it”
Me: “that would make you a taxi service”

Have you ever had a friend that would just use you for

I used to envy my grandparents.
60 years of marriage, and my grandpa still calls her “hun” and “love.”
I had to know his secret, and he told me… “I forgot her name years ago.”

I think we need to acknowledge older people very seriously. Sometimes when I see an

A couple just moved into hotel. And the hotel clerk asks the man after helping him with his luggage. – Anything else? – NO, thanks, – Maybe, your wife needs something? – Oh, yeah. Thank you for your reminder. Do you sell greeting cards?

I don’t even know

Daisy was sitting in a bar when a stranger walked up to her and asked, “If you woke up in the woods and scratched your butt and felt Vaseline, would you tell anyone?” “Hell no!” she said. The stranger then asked, “If you felt further into your

My 4-year-old sister saw a picture in a zoo book and said, “Look at this! It’s a frickin’ elephant!” I took a deep breath, then asked “What did you call it?” “It’s a frickin’ elephant! It says so on the picture!” And so, it does, “A f

Daisy walks into a pharmacy (chemist) and asks if they sell extra-large condoms.
The chemist replies, “Yes they are just over there.” She thanks him and stands there near them. “Would you like a packet,” the chemist asks. Daisy replies, “No that’s fine. I will just wait until

I asked Siri how to delete emails and it responded, “ask Hillary.”

Lol, this is actually funny because Hillary was caught with emails that were deleted. If you are confused about what Hillary, it is Hillary Clinton, President Bill Clinton’s Wife. As Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were

I was at Hallmark and overheard a woman ask an employee where the cheapest wedding cards are because “they won’t be together long.”

Lol, this is actually a good one and I will remember it next time I look through gift cards. Sometimes, I wonder just how silly